Just a warning: spending time in the Word and in prayer may result in conviction during the day. I've been weak on morning devos while sick, but I'm getting back into them...for better or worse.
We've been in a bind the last few weeks. Shane's brother needed the truck he graciously lets us use almost as our own. This is only a problem on Tuesday and Wednesday each week when I need a car during the day/evening for work, kids' practices, and church. We've spent 3 weeks begging, borrowing, and stealing rides on those two days. Sometimes at night I would wake up and worry about how I'd get the girls to and from the places they needed to be. God provided, but it sure can be hard to ask for help!
Shane's been looking around for a car that gets great gas mileage for him to drive to work, freeing up my van for us while he's gone. Well, the car that became available instead wasn't exactly my type.
Shane's aunt has a Lincoln Towncar for sale. Now, there's nothing wrong with Towncars, but I associate them with grandmas. I'm trying to make a clear distinction in my life that I'm not a grandma-not even close :) So, I had a little attitude about it.
Then I read this blog entry and fell under great conviction that I'd wronged my husband and the Lord. You see, I'd told him to go ahead and get the car (for an amazing price, by the way) if he wanted to, even though he knew I wanted to stay with the fuel efficient car search. When he told me today that he'd decided to do it, I got angry. Pride has a way of bringing on anger.
Shane found a car that will fit all of us right now and will work in a pinch for most of us when the baby is here. If his mom and grandmother want to take the four girls somewhere, they can drive this car. It gives us a nice, second car. It isn't beat up, it runs well, has a/c, and is more than adequate. Yet I had to balk at his (and God's) provision.
How many other ways do we (I) turn our noses up in the air when God is giving provision? I really don't think I want to know. I know he's given me a blessing I'm struggling to accept...is that about pride, too? Probably. I'm so thankful that He continues to work in us, aren't you?