Math Books and Vitamins

A friend who confessed to only skimming through all this nutrition talk encouraged me to take a break or two for those of y'all not so keen on greens. We'll get back to healthy eating shortly.

The other day the UPS man delivered a couple of boxes. The kids, as always, got excited. I tried to calm them down; I didn't want their hopes up. The boxes were just vitamins and new math books.

This is the season of math books and vitamins, laundry, baseball games and sleepovers. This is not the season in our family's life for something new and exciting. No new faces will join our crew; this is it-the seven of us. From here on out, it's not growing the family, it's helping each child grow.

This was a bittersweet realization for me. Sure, it's nice to start giving away mounds of baby clothes that won't be worn again by anyone in my home. I can hardly wait to be rid of the bulky baby items we won't ever need again. Diaper bags, I won't miss you!

But there is an element of surprise that will always be missing from our home now. We are absolutely sure (without some serious heaven-sent intervention) our family will not get any bigger. There is no tiny thought of Audrey as a big sister. She won't be one. There's no wonder when I fold up too-small baby clothes...will someone new come along? No, there is no new one coming. This is it. This is us. Who our family is.

Now it's just maintaining, growing up the ones we got. Yep, a little sad, but a bit freeing too. I have to focus on that freedom. You see, I think I'm a builder not a maintainer. I can start a pregnancy center, revamp another one and so on, but I'm not the one to stick around for 20 years making it run in the day to day. Of course, I don't get to switch families and start all over--and I don't want to, not today anyway, so it's a changing of seasons for me.

I was wrong when I said we won't add anyone else to our family. In about ten years (or the blink of an eye, really) we'll start adding sons-in-laws. I've been praying for them for years, I am excited to see who God will bring for my girls and I have much work to do to get my girls ready for a life of service to their Lord, husbands and children.

Images of the Season

Before Christmas is too far behind us, I want to share some great pictures, or rather some decent pictures of some great memories.

Bethany (bottom row 3rd from the right) and Hope (blondie just a little to the right of center) in our church's living Christmas tree.

Some of the lights in Marshall, Texas. We went for a LONG drive over to Marshall (in East Texas) to see the lights and eat dinner with Shane's brother Scott.

Our local Christmas parade with three avid fans (it's all of six minutes long and mostly filled with ambulances and fire trucks).

A tired 2 year old...Christmas is BIG when you're 2!

Shane & my cousin Jamie at our annual Cousin's Christmas party.

Audrey in her Christmas dress the Sunday before Christmas. On second thought, she has about four Christmas outfits with all the hand-me-downs! She was decked out each Sunday of December.

My big girls...can you see the anticipation on Hope's face?!

The real, live Mrs. Potato Head is in the house!

Think she's getting enough milk? Check out those cheeks and the double chin! Just a side note of great importance-she has my brown eyes unlike any of my other children! Yay!

One of my favorite moments of Christmas. Jaika especially loves my 89 year old Grandma.

My Best Christmas Ever

This Christmas was a little different in several ways. First, Daddy had to work Christmas Eve night so he didn't get home until around 8:45 Christmas morning--way late into the day as far as kids are concerned. I needed a stalling tactic to keep them happy until they could open gifts. We set the table and had a nice sit down breakfast. You know sitting down anywhere other than by the tree is forbidden on most Christmases, lol. The kids did as well as can be expected and I was only asked 42 times when Daddy would be home.

Shane arrived just in the nick of time. He'd just heard about the pilots who send the kids who've lost a parent in the war to Disney World. He was so moved by this reminder of the sacrifices made for our freedom that he decided to lead us in prayer for those kiddos & families who were missing someone Christmas morning. I was touched by his sensitivity.

Okay so we opened, stuffed trash, opened, stuffed trash and opened some more. Everyone only had about 5-6 gifts under our tree, but there are a lot of us, you know!

Off to Mom & Dad's for a short gift exchange then off to my aunt's across town for the Jones Christmas (my family).

This is where the best Christmas ever part comes in-hang with me!

Meet my little brother Scott & sister in law Mary (they're holding my Audrey here):

Mary was diagnosed with colon cancer this year. She & I were in the hospital at the same time (different hospitals)-me having a baby and Mary having her tumor removed. This after months of chemo & radiation treatments to shrink it. She had complications and had to go back in for surgery a few days after her initial surgery. They had to drive back & forth to Dallas, a good ways from our humble little rural town and Scott used all of his paid leave. They were in financial stress, to say the least-especially since Mary hasn't been able to work most of the year.

Meet the gift box:

The family started cooking up a conspiracy to skip the Chinese Christmas this year and instead put the money toward Scott & Mary, without breathing a word to them. Throughout the day, people slipped cash into this innoculous decoration...

Meet one of the crafters:

Each of the kiddos in the entire family brought a homemade item to auction off. Hope is making a bird house, Ashlyn painted note cards with sweet greetings, Bethany painted a purple polka dot picture frame, and cousins made book marks, sculptures, a collage, and even a book! We all thought the items would go for a few bucks a piece, with the point being just to let the kids feel involved but they raised over a hundred dollars!

Scott & Mary didn't know what was going on :)

Then we presented the gift box to them, explaining that they are more important than gifts and we felt they needed the help this year. They were speechless, but not necessarily tearless.

I've never been more proud of our family. We didn't leave the celebration with as many gifts (our Chinese gifts are usually pretty good, especially for the girls-I have aunts that know how to shop!), but with a special memory that exceeds any joy from opening gifts. Scott and Mary left with almost $700 to help pay for medical expenses or whatever else they need.

Be blessed-I know I am today!

PS-Happy 30th Birthday Scott!

What's in a name?

He's not sure if it's pure peer pressure of if he actually likes the name, but Audrey's middle name is Shayne.

Summer initiated the idea, but it spread like wildfire to all my friends both far & near. Everyone thinks it's really cool (and so do I!). Thanks for wearing him down, girls!

I pined to be named after someone, so I'm glad this baby has a name sake! Very cool.

I did get a song, though:

Windy by The Association:

Who's peeking out from under a stairway
Calling a name that's lighter than air
Who's bending down to give me a rainbow
Everyone knows it's Windy
Who's tripping down the streets of the city
Smiling at everybody she sees
Who's reaching out to capture a moment
Everyone knows it's Windy

And Windy has stormy eyes
That flash at the sound of lies
And Windy has wings to fly
Above the clouds, above the clouds
Who's tripping down the streets of the city
Smiling at everybody she sees
Who's reaching out to capture a moment
Everyone knows it's Windy

Sorry Audrey, I think I just made this post all about me...

Picture Day

Yesterday morning we spent some time at an old church building I'd passed a million times but never really noticed. A friend who just happens to be a stellar photographer showed us the place and took some shots of the family and my baby belly. Shane grabbed our camera as well and had fun shooting the girls while Jonna did my pictures.

Let me back up though-we all wore white shirts. Jaybird wasn't dressed yet and she came to me while I was getting ready. She had a white shirt with dark purple flowers on it. Her heart was set on wearing it, but no one would help her put it on since that wasn't what she was supposed to wear. Being the girl who knows what she wants, she ran away to find her pink plaid swim suit. Yep, she put it on right over her purple flowered shirt. Ta-da! She's ready for her picture to be made! This is so "her" by the way.

I'll be putting more in my sidebar as well as showing off the professional ones as soon as we get them!

Happy Day

Do you ever feel like a bird would feel if it came in for a drink in my birdbath? Today I felt like Satan was lying in wait for me just like this cat is awaiting its prey. Yesterday was full of disappointments. Many of them were little-like not being able to find any maternity pants at my favorite thrift store. It was no small deal though when Shane went to work 4 hours early only to be told the schedule was changed and they forgot to tell him. Ash's team lost their game and it was simply a long, hard day.



So today is our 13th anniversary. We both had to work, Ash had another game, and I was still exhausted. I cried a lot this morning. We didn't do school and I didn't even shower until right before work. I tried to be happy, but my heart and mind were just too tired and stressed. I sat on the porch, enjoying the morning shade and noticed this neat spider web. Do you think the heart shape was a gift from God to us on our anniversary?

I tried to count my blessings (even this one, lol!). I thought about my friends going through other, bigger ordeals this week. There is a lot of struggling going on in the lives of those around me and I know I'm blessed beyond measure. But I was still worn out, emotionally, physically...and I wanted to feel like today was special, but it just felt like any other day. I wanted to go to work and escape in the work on my desk.

But my husband and friends had other plans--secret plans. I did go to work, but instead of hiding behind my desk, I was drawn into the staff work room where romantic delicacies awaited...chocolate covered cherries, strawberries, grapes, and cheesecake! Shane had conspired with Melissa (in the dots with her own baby belly!) to gift me with all these goodies. Thanks Melissa!

Shane had these beautiful flowers delivered then he showed up (I'm sure just for the cheesecake!) with wedding pictures to share with my friends. Boy, we've changed in 13 years. What I'm most proud of is our deep affection for each other. I am still madly in love with him and it only gets deeper. I could have never imagined love this strong and deep.

Here's a close up of the flowers. He researched the meanings behind each one and planned it all out. He tried to secure a bed and breakfast but all the ones he was interested in were booked. We plan to try to sneak away Friday night and then maybe book the B&B in September, as a last getaway before the baby comes.

I'm still tired and can't wait to crawl in bed, but my heart is full. Today was special because my man did a great job making me feel like his queen.

Guess what I got him? Yellow balloons :)

My Life in Pictures

We've had a lot of fun with our new camera. I've taken some shots the last few days that give a fun glimpse into our days and I thought I'd share. Sorry dial up friends, it's very picture heavy!

I messed up and misunderstood the softball coach. She told me our game tonight was cancelled, but I thought it was next week's game. So, off to the field we go only to turn back around and come home. Ash was embarrassed since her coach was out there watching her son play so we were busted. It wasn't as bad as the time last year when I sent the girls to Awana in their PJs a week before it was actually pajama night, but when you're a tween, any embarrassment is too much. So, in order to redeem myself and enjoy the nice evening outside, I made an obstacle course for the girls...They hopped through hula hoops...

And walked in funny ways...

This one got a little help from big sister...

And this one needed no help! Boy did she go!

Yes, this was part of the course!

And so was this...she's singing the ABC's before she can move on to the next part.

Well, here come the dramatics. She doesn't want to wait for her next turn. But she's so cute!

This one has issues. She thinks the fuzzy things that fall out of the pecan tree are worms or something and once she saw them on the ground she refused to be set back down!

This is all of them very early in the morning. Hope is sleeping quite soundly as you can tell (even though she thinks she can only sleep in my bed, ugghhh). Then Ash & Beth are next with Adri with half the bed to herself!

We do the buddy system at our house. Ash is Beth's buddy and they're very close. (Buddies help the little ones get their shoes on, pour cereal, or whatever.) It's very sweet how Beth curls up to Ash when they sleep.

This is Adri-my cousin's baby--who's about to be 2!! She's with us Mon-Fri, 7:30-5:30, so she's become a part of the family. She's a doll...

Here's the second set of buddies. This was taken by Ash on the porch swing this morning. I see Hope maturing in her buddy job. She's doing good at nurturing and I love to see her grow in this area. I can see that she & Jay are getting closer, but Jay also really likes Ash...and Beth...she's a friendly girl! By the way, did you notice Jay & Hope have the same exact hair? Funny, since none of the rest match up at all!

We don't need real toys! The little ones just like the couch pillows and totes!

This one thinks she can read...notice the book is upside down!

So this is my crew...and just a fun note, Hope just got out of the shower and was singing in her southern twangy voice. I suspect she was singing "Sunrise Sunset" from Fiddler on the Roof. The song was in our wedding and I pointed this out when we watched it a few days ago. I suspect Hope was singing it because Bethany came out of the bathroom singing "Sunrise...Sunset...Sunrise...Sunet..."over and over. Pretty funny from a 4 year old!

Do you know any weird people?

So, in your circle of pals, do you have anyone who stands out as weird? You know the type...the ones who might do the following:

Homeschool
Breastfeed forever
Make their own bread
Let their husbands make the decisions
Resist traditional medicine-at least some of the time
Drink raw milk (straight from the cow)
Don't watch TV
Have big families
Search out organic produce
Own a juicer, Vitamix, or Bosch (sp?)
Don't know pop culture
Use all sorts of crazy contraptions to "wear" their baby
Vote conservative

Well, while I don't know anyone like that, I just wonder about them. Do they know they're weird? Did they become weird one step at a time and never realize when they'd gone too far?

What if you knew someone like that and then found out they were considering using cloth diapers? Would you even associate with them? Maybe if they promised you wouldn't have to change one of them?

If you're eyebrows perk up at some of that list, yet you like me anyway (and not just so you can get cheap entertainment out of laughing at me over dinner) thanks ;)

PS, I'll keep disposables on hand for when you watch my kids, lol.

Our Family Planning Stand

Because we have this girl gang, I am constantly asked by strangers if we are "done". The short answer is this: I don't know.

The very long answer is this (the last paragraph is a very short summary, lol) :)

I don't know, and I'm really wanting you to not walk away and snicker if I admit I'm considering what life would be like if we had one more. Some days I think I want one more and some days I think I'd like to give one or two away, lol!

You may be surprised to know that we aren't "quiver full" which means we'll have as many children as our bodies produce, thus saith the Lord. Now, I know some QF families and I have much respect for them and their convictions. I cheer for them out in this materialistic world they're butting heads with. But, we've not come to those same conclusions. We believe that God speaks to us about family size in more ways than by just allowing us to become pregnant (or not). We feel he can speak to us through scripture, through prayer, through circumstances and any way he pleases, just like he does all the time when He tells a family they're to go to the mission field or to move or to start a ministry or whatever. A person called to the mission field does not just buy a random plane ticket and fly to an undisclosed location saying the Lord will fly him wherever he's supposed to go, so why would God only expect us to determine our family size by the operation of our bodies? I know God opens and closes the womb, but he also speaks to us. I think God is big enough to do both and we don't have to understand it.

That being said, we do not believe in contraceptives that could be abortifacients (all hormone based contraceptives can possibly allow conception but then not let the uterus sustain that tiny baby's life, causing the baby to be lost usually without the mother ever knowing she was pregnant). I know there's debate over this, but for our family, we aren't taking any risks.
We've used Natural Family Planning or Fertility Awareness Method (NFP/FAM) for our entire 12 year marriage. I'm not super diligent all the time, but I know how to be if I want to be. Right now, I want to be, FYI ;) DH is fully on board with all this.

So, no I did not get "fixed". I hate that phrase. It ought to be in the "You Might be a Redneck Book". Dogs get fixed. As of right now, we've not made a permanent decision. I listened to a great tape series called A Biblical Approach to Family Planning with Dennis Rainey from Family Life. It had a great description of abortifacients and a good discussion on vasectomies and tubals. In my heart, I don't feel it's what God intended, especially for young families. I guess I'm almost QF in that I feel it's sad when families say they only want one child and she had her tubes tied. They just don't know what they're missing. However, I also believe there is a time when it is necessary to consider this route, but I'm not sure exactly when that is other than obvious health risks related to getting pregnant. I'm not sure we won't ever choose this route, but not right now.

Okay, so after that dissertation, do I still want more dc? Maybe. Sometimes just after the baby was born, my husband and I would both feel someone was missing from our family. I don't feel this as often now. I think the further I get from the current baby's baby days, the more the desire will grow. I'm not a baby person, exactly, so I can't explain it...I just don't know if I feel "done" or not.

Some days I do feel very done. When my life is chaotic or the girls are at each other's throats. But that's a flesh reaction.

Some days I want more. But usually its because I've discovered so many cool slings I want a chance to wear them all! That's a flesh reaction, too. Sometimes I think of my labor with #4 and how short it was and I want to experience that again. That's an insane flesh reaction. Just one of those mothery things that happens after you deliver a baby-your brain cells leak out with the placenta.

So, whatever we choose, it'll be okay. I have a superb dh who takes good care of me. If I have another baby and go all psycho again with some mild depression, we'll get through it. If we call it quits, we'll be okay, too. I'm not sure I'll be okay much longer with all the silly comments people make...here are some:

"Boy you have your hands full". Actually, this one doesn't bug me, but it bugs a lot of big families. It's just a convesation starter, cut people some slack.

"Are you done yet?" Really it's none of your business, especially if you're a stranger. If you're my friend, you already know you can ask me anything, so this doesn't apply to you.

"You did get fixed didn't you?" This one really bothers me. I just smile really big and say, "No." It kind of leaves people wondering. What really gets me is when Christians have this attitude. Think about it-is it really pro-life to suggest to someone they shouldn't have any more dc? Why can't Christians be fully pro-life and encourage big families? Don't you think we catch enough flack from the rest of the world? Ick.

Okay, so that's my longest post ever and all it really said is: We use NFP and we don't know if we're done. Oh, and I might add that if we aren't done, please don't give me a hard time, that's what I fear more than not being able to feed/clothe/send my child to college.

Meet our family

Shane-My husband who has no estrogen of his own but constantly finds himself "slimed" with the hormone that floods our home. He loves being a dad to all girls-he eats it up, much to the surprise of everyone who hears we have no boys. He'd love to pass on the family name (I so don't get that), but he may just have to leave that up to his little brother. Shane worked at Boeing for about six years before he was laid off. Thanks to NAFTA, he was retrained (at no cost to us) for another career. Since he didn't especially want to be a barber or dental assistant, he chose a law enforcement degree from the small list of career paths the government offers. He's been working in this field at the county level since Christmas of 2005. He also works as a security guard for a major gas plant 2 days a week. He's a laid back nice guy who loves to dote on his girls. He's often taking them out on dates or letting them win laughter-filled wrestling matches.

Me-me-me-I'm an average homeschool mom. Not the denim jumper type...the minivan type, jean wearing, wannabe granola kind! I think too much, have issues I think no one else has, but I'm blessed. I have worked part time as a director of a pregnancy resource center and I have a BS in Family Studies. I love to read-especially Christian parenting books, homeschool books, and some fiction (Alton Gansky is a favorite). I'm a new sewer (that would be sew-er), A wanna-be gardener... I'm terribly afraid of snakes and I never follow through with my gardens so they end up full of weeds or dying of thirst. I wear my babies in a sling, co sleep, nurse until they're old enough to ask for it verbally, and I love the idea of eating whole foods and organics (but struggle follow that lifestyle 100%). We aren't full quiver, but have used NFP...is there anything else to say? I am surrounded by friends who do a darn good job of making me believe they like me :) I'm blessed!

Ash-is 11! I've been a parent for oven ten years! Wow. Oh yeah, this is supposed to be about her. She is a bit of a tomboy but that is wearing off. She likes what she likes and it doesn't matter what is in style. She loves homeschooling, loves her sisters, and loves to read. She's a huge fan of Little House on the Prairie, Lord of the Rings, Narnia, and anything about horses. She's been saving for a horse since she knew what one was and often has more money in her horse fund than I have in my savings account. She has a special bond with Bethany, who sleeps with her. I "buddy up" my children and Beth is Ash's buddy. Ash is very much a firstborn-she's a second mother to her little sisters and a huge help around the house.

Hope-This is my typical girl. She likes all things pink and sparkly. She's spunky in all she does. She has a tall lean body that never stops. She is gifted with hospitality and is the first to offer any guest a drink or some food. She can really serve beautifully when she wants to. She has a fierce determination that both scares me and gives me hope that she'll persevere in whatever job the Lord calls her to. She asked Jesus into her heart the summer of 2006 and I believe is trying to learn to serve him. She's bright and happy with fresh ideas and a good attitude. She loves math and likes us to read The Boxcar Children to her. She is a new reader and promises to love books as much as her big sister!

Bethany-Our tiny BB (her initials). She's five but wears a size 4. She is simply tiny for her age--but she's perfectly healthy. She's a cute brunette with bouncy little curls and blue eyes. She doesn't really like it when the big girls do school because it means they can't play with her! She does love to be read to and is enjoying her Sonlight K). BB keeps us laughing with her childish innocence and affectionate disposition. I tell her all the time that she's my favorite....five year old!

Jaika, pronounced jay' ka-I sigh big when I think of what to write. She has been a whirlwind from the start. She arrived 10 days late (in the heat of the Texas Summer!). She is miracle baby in that she was born with her cord in a knot. God saved her from it tightening. The doctor probably pulled it tight when he delivered the placenta, or God chose to keep nutrients flowing through a knotted cord. The nurses were surprised at her healthy delivery. Our L&D nurse said she's only seen one other baby born alive with a knotted cord in her ten years of L&D. We praise the Lord for her even though the transition from three to four children has been the hardest for me. Jaybird is active--she's constantly into something, but she's oh so affectionate. Oh, and she looks just like her sisters. They're clones, we've been told. I promise, I birthed every one of them!

As if one baby born with a knotted cord isn't strange enough, Audrey was born in November of 2008 via emergency C-section and, you guessed it, had a knotted cord as well. She is healthy, though and has won our hearts! We can't wait to see what kind of personality she'll develop.

Audrey was a true surprise baby. We were discussing the possibility of being totally "done" when I realized I was pregnant with her. We are so happy she's a part of our family! However, after a second C-section and complications that followed, we feel the Lord closing the door on more children. We have a peace about it, although it was a hard day when we made it permanent.

We live in the same area Shane and I grew up in. We actually live in the same house I got to play in as a child. We moved into my grandparent's home after they moved into an assisted living facility. It's a somewhat neat, but drafty house built in the 1890s; one of the oldest houses in town. Our parents and brothers live near by (there are no sisters for me or Shane, but God's given me lots of girl-friend-sisters). I work just down the street and Shane works half an hour away. We've homeschooled from the start and plan to finish out that way. We love Sonlight and will probably stay with it unless an equally incredible company comes along that would allow me to combine my children into more of a one room school house affair. We are heavily involved in pro-life ministry in two counties. We are attending in a non-denominational church we really like but have previously only been in Southern Baptist churches.

Made it this far? You should win some loyal reader award.