Friday, November 21, 2008

If you've been reading for at least a couple of months, you know we agonized over the decision to permanently limit our family size. I wrote about it in this post and had the most comments ever.

We decided we didn't feel at peace with such an irreversible decision and we began talking to my OB about other options.

Then we had our second child with a knotted cord. There's nothing genetic about a cord knotting, except maybe the extra long cords that allow for easier bow ties. We aren't superstitious or anything, but after Audrey's delivery we felt another baby would "tempt the fates" and that bothered us. (Please know we don't believe in fate, that's just the simplist way to convey the way we feel.)

One week later, as I was going to the hospital for all the tests that stemmed from the complications, I said to Shane that he needed to call his doctor and schedule his appointment-we were done.

My cardiologist confirmed this. He gave us a stern warning that this should be our last pregnancy. Any other pregnancies would probably result in the same story, and possibly even worse. That just confirmed what we were both thinking. Shane's appointment is December 9th.

So how do I reconcile this? With sound medical advice, it's easy. We were open to the Lord regarding having more children and with this last delivery, he shut the door.

It's a little sad to fold up my maternity clothes knowing I'll be getting rid of them, not just storing them. No more kicks from an unborn child, no more sonograms, no more tiny fingers & toes. We're savoring Audrey...

It'll be nice to look forward though, and move past the diaper bag stage. We've almost always been in a diaper bag stage!

Hmmmm, have I ever mentioned that our hearts have always been open to adoption? ;)


D Unstoppable Mom said...

Look on the bright side, you will be donating your maternity clothes to the center I assume, and that is a good thing.....AND think of what you can do with the space that would have been used for storage.....ALSO, you won't have to be saving the baby clothes for the next one....yes, that is a hard one, but once you start it is very liberating!!!
I love ya girl, I kn ow how hard this decision is for you, but I believe that God is telling you something here through sound medical advice. Make peace with it!

Latte-n-Libre said...

I know you and Shane didn't enter into this decision lightly. I have always known you to follow God's direction in this area. I know you will continue to follow the Lord's direction as He speaks to you. hugs, b

Anonymous said...

I too know this was hard for you. However, I have to agree that the medical advise does change things. Praying for peace and for minimal tears as you move past this stage of life.


Luke said...

I hear adoption is a beautiful thing. I'm still in the "waiting" part that's difficult, but I'm looking forward to the joy [smile].